Concern indeed..

I came across this incident where a friend of mine asked "What's going on?" since I was sharing about something with another friend. So out of respect and trust that this other friend was kind enough to listen to my sharing, I shared. Before long this friend started giving remarks of own experiences too.

Well, I was sharing about life and how it has been.. surely there are ups and downs and apparently lately with more downs..so this friend too commented of own downs and how this friend still survives..

All I asked was just a listening ear and an open heart, I need no comments as yet. I had not even finished my words. Oh well, I let that friend talked and in the end I became the ear. Haha.

Funny friends I meet lately. So being concern does not necessarily mean you need to comfort the person.. silence might just do the work.

Which is Important?

I recently came across this friend of mine who can't seem to judge the importance of life and the things that come with it. As a result, everything seems to go wrong ALL the time and this friend ends up very disheartened and upset..

So what IS important?

1, A final farewell party for a close friend or to stay at home and accompany old parents?

2, To celebrate a very close friend's birthday or to rush to the hospital for another friend's sudden labor?

Sometimes we tend to get our priorities mixed up. We feel as if we know what to do yet we did the wrong thing. And people end up being so mad and we end up "Why?! What did I do wrong...?"

Everyone has their own outlook of life. Everyone sees things differently, of different importance. But if everyone sees Example 1 that it is more important to stay home than attend the farewell party, yet we feel otherwise, there might just be a tiny confusion of importance in our judgment. Similarly with Example 2, it is more important to be at the hospital with the friend in need of support rather than cooking dinner for a close friend's birthday..though we may again, think otherwise. And that's where we look at all the other factors that come with it - who needs me more, how will I function at the scene, what is my role etc..

And that's where moral comes in, and the fight of the "good" and "bad" in ourselves. To enjoy with our friend who is leaving for the last time or to stay home and listen to old parents ramble. To celebrate a birthday with joy and happiness or to be at the hospital and watch a friend in pain. Then again, it depends how much we are needed.

But all the same, we can't benefit everyone with whichever decision we are going to make. Someone will get hurt, and it comes down to how much hurt they get and if those hurts can be made up with future accompaniment.

Example 1 - We WILL meet our friends again in near future when they come back to their hometown, but we might not see our parents so often as they are old and weak..and they were the ones who took care of us since young.

Example 2 - There WILL be more birthdays to celebrate in future, or we can throw a surprise belated gathering.. but we might risk not being there at the hospital where life and death in concerned.

So, weigh it. If it was YOU in those scenarios, won't you like to have someone to accompany you in your difficult times?

Need a Laugh?

DO YOU GO TO CHURCH?

A friend was in front of me coming out of church one day, and the preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands. He grabbed my friend by the hand and pulled him aside.

The Pastor said to him, "You need to join the Army of the Lord!"

My friend replied, "I'm already in the Army of the Lord, Pastor."

Pastor questioned, "How come I don't see you except at Christmas and Easter?"

He whispered back, "I'm in the secret service."

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CHURCH FOR THIS DRUNK

A man sobering up from the night before is sitting through the Sunday sermon, finding it long and boring. Still feeling hung over and tired, he finally nods off.

The priest has been watching him all a long, noticing his apparent hangover and is disgusted. At the end of the sermon, the preacher decides to make an example of him.

He says to his congregation, "All those wishing to have a place in heaven, please stand."

The whole room stands up except, of course, the sleeping man.

Then the preacher says even more loudly, "And he who would like to find a place in hell please STAND UP!"

The weary man catching only the last part groggily stands up, only to find that he's the only one standing.

Confused and embarrassed he says, "I don't know what we're voting on here, Father, but it sure seems like you and me are the only ones standing for it!"

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WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?

Sometimes women are overly suspicious of their husbands. When Adam stayed out very late for a few nights, Eve became upset. "You're running around with other women," she charged.

"You're being unreasonable," Adam responded. "You're the only woman on earth." The quarrel continued until Adam fell asleep, only to be awakened by someone poking him in the chest.

It was Eve. "What do you think you're doing?" Adam demanded.
"Counting your ribs," said Eve.

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A VERY FAITHFUL WOMAN

An elderly lady was well-known for her faith and for her boldness in talking about it. She would stand on her front porch and shout "PRAISE THE LORD!"

Next door to her lived an atheist who would get so angry at her proclamations he would shout, "There ain't no Lord!!"

Hard times set in on the elderly lady, and she prayed for GOD to send her some assistance. She stood on her porch and shouted "PRAISE THE LORD. GOD I NEED FOOD!! I AM HAVING A HARD TIME. PLEASE LORD, SEND ME SOME GROCERIES!!"

The next morning the lady went out on her porch and noted a large bag of groceries and shouted, "PRAISE THE LORD."

The neighbour jumped from behind a bush and said, "Aha! I told you there was no Lord. I bought those groceries, God didn't."

The lady started jumping up and down and clapping her hands and said, "PRAISE THE LORD. He not only sent me groceries, but He made the devil pay for them. Praise the Lord!"

-Credits to those who created these humour. :)

Silent Reflection

I did not abandon my blog, haha, just that I felt it should go on 'Silent Reflection' for a while.

Amazingly, keeping quiet is one of the toughest things to do. Can we as humans, stay silent (not talking, texting, calling, passing messages, or simply no communication with another human) for 2 days? It's tough. I mean, what to do while keeping silent, besides keeping silent??

Boring....

Well, try it. :)

I tried it, it was rather nice, I would say, to be at peace with yourself after so many 'happenings'. To be able to just sit and think about yourself, about how things around you come about, and about how you relate with those things. Though at first try, you will feel great discomfort as the very next moment you want to say something or you want to communicate with another person. But once the world goes silent, you feel yourself in your own world of which no one else can disturb, where you get to set the rules, where that world alone belongs to you.

Much uncertainty if you understand that kind of experience, but if you succeed 2 days without communication, share with me. :)

Saying No

One of the most difficult words as a friend, to say No to another friend.

Being a Yes person burdens one down if time is not managed properly. As in the Communication's Drama Triangle; being the rescuer but end up as the victim. Victim of unable to complete own responsibilities and taking unto one's shoulders the problems and responsibilities of another. Not only do you not get enough rest, there is no time for yourself, your family, your other friends, free time even; to victims, true enough?

Sad as it is, it's true.

So, how to say No?

Prioritise. Know what is more important: the friendship or the "taking of advantage" by the friend? I've learnt my lesson and it takes time to say No, since the great empathy is there to keep the Yes going.

Try it once, and you'll enjoy saying No at your busiest times.

Mental not: To be logical and practise wisdom at all times.

Rebirth

The Holy Week entering Easter - a renewal of faith and commitment. I felt different this year.

Monday - Wednesday: Life was ...down the hill. It felt as if I was walking towards the place of crucifixion, being spat on, jeered, mocked.. I wondered if that was how Jesus felt. I felt the burden of the cross he carried.

Thursday: The evening of prayer and waiting.. I have never knelt so long before the Lord, yearning for his presence, for his grace and mercy. I have never felt so sorry before him.. putting myself in Judas' shoes. I was sinful.

Friday: What greater love than a man to lay down his life for another. It was a day of solemness, a day to reflect the perfect love portrayed.. and a day of which my dear puppy died being knocked down by a car.. Much despair and hopelessness.. silence engulfed me.

Saturday: Day of breaking free from all the lowliness, all the hopelessness. For Easter - the resurrection, a new life will begin. Easter Vigil that night was wonderful, a time spent with family celebrating the new light of Christ. What greater JOY to hope for than the one from God!

Sunday: The Coffee Morning sale, a big hit despite everyone lacking rest due to last minute errands and preparations. Learnt more about making things happen than saying things happen. Being childlike was the Lord's calling. The Lord indeed rose from the dead, that even death could never do him apart .. a miracle of rebirth, in me.

I died with Christ on Good Friday, and he lifted me up on his Resurrection Day - for I am his beloved, nothing can take that fact away. (Lev 12:26)

I pray for a new life in you too this Easter! He is RISEN! Alleluia! :)

When sun rises and stars blink

Looking out the window each morning and night, I see the same images - all except the colour; it's bright yellow during the day and dark black during the night. As each day passes by, the time left for each other also shortens.

A friend once shared with me, one should find time to spend with close friends now that they are still here with us, rather than wait till they have left (for all reasons) then think about going out with them.

It is selfish just to spend time developing a friendship just for the sake of boosting the friend's self-esteem, or building the foundation of faith, so a friend said. As a result, when the friend can stand on one's own, the initial friend lets go so the friend can move on. There silence filled the communication atmosphere, though little thoughts of kindness do travel through the air now and then to keep the string attached.

The thought of wanting the best for the friend has been reflected back: that just making friends for that reason and letting the friend go after the 'mission' has been accomplished are one-way acts, for one's own personal benefits not wanting to have further relation with the friend.

But whatever happened to mutual understanding and lasting friendship? Two friends are true friends if both can still maintain good relationship despite the many silent moments spent together. Is that even true?

I'm confused at how perception changes the whole human mind. I have yet to find out how to channel my sight to see the unique perception of others. Until then, I shall see the sun rise and stars blink each day and night.

The Pinch of Salt

As I prepared meals this week, I always hesitated when it comes to putting in that pinch of salt. Should it be one pinch? Or a little bit more than that pinch?

I realised life sometimes has that moment requiring us to put in an extra pinch of salt. It differs for each individual since we all eat different amount of salt.

Putting in that extra pinch at times require a lot of effort, till we end up questioning ourselves if it was worth all the hard work. The outcome might not appear immediately, but in the long term, it will. As long as you keep adding the extra pinch.

I was adding my pinch of salt to the dish I was preparing, and I doubted when putting it into the wok. I felt my heart nudging me to just put that much, and that was how much I put in. Sometimes we feel the nudge in ourselves to put more salt, or to cut down the salt input. Self intuition has always worked for me, so I listen.

I have no idea what I'm writing, but I know it takes a pinch of salt to make the dish taste nice. :)

Surrender

The 3rd YCS East Malaysia Encounter (EME) 2010 was successfully held in Sibu. This was one camp that called me to trust in the Lord, knowing how different the team worked this time round. Despite many head-cracking events and all the squeeze before the EME, all things went well, thanks to the big one up there!

The call to surrender is easy, but the act to surrender is difficult. Who would have known things would turn out well when every hope and trust is put on God? That is faith.

May the Spirit continue to work wonders in the lives of all those involved with the camp. May they be instruments to bring more glory and praise to the one who brought them out of the deepest pit from the camp.

All glory and honour and praise to the Almighty God~

In the Calm..

In the calm.. of Your presence, I am listening Lord....

This song struck me today as I read a friend's blog. I have been having a very crazy 2 weeks, rushing over 2 assignment reports, 2 presentations, 2 friends in my group. I think I even rushed God to "do good" to me. =.=

With the upcoming trip, life was even more not pleasant. So much to finalise and everything had to be done there and then. So much for seeing light amidst darkness.

Yesterday was the presentation, 2-4.30pm, 5.15-7.20pm. A whole long day indeed. My group was the first, and being typical me- always getting the "First" lot. So we kicked off everything. I would say, I am very proud of my teammates, for they gave their all despite the language barrier, despite the many glitches - they were serious about being in a team, and doing their best for the team. :)

Rushing for RCIA Mass - Presentation of the Creed, I arrived 2 minutes before it started, much to Fr Albert's astonishment that I was almost late. I was grateful I did not crash anyone during my drive from college to Church. Haha.

Rushed for EMMM meeting after that, to know that meeting was ending. -.- My college mate resisted attending meeting after nights of endless assignment rushing. It was a day of fast. Lol. Adrenaline rush, he said. Haha. 'Cause immediately after we're done with our presentations, we felt hungry and tired. Hmm..

Amidst all the happenings, be it of my will or not, I felt God's presence in the people around me. I actually trusted my whole presentation day to him, knowing he would put words into my mouth when I forget what to speak about. It was difficult to trust the whole morning, because I was so tired from the previous night and weak as I was, my human side told me to strive harder and work from my self limits. But God was all so amazing, to grant me a Spirit-filled stomach, mind and soul. He was amazing, to the extend that I said "I am presenting for the Lord, and I will present my best for the Lord." Knowing he is standing beside me always, I trusted. And HE never failed my trust.

All glory to the Almighty KING!

As the week died down a little, the trip will continue to boost up the confidence that God does not stop working just in my study life. He will journey with us and I pray and trust, that he will use us, his unworthy instruments for the salvation of all!

Time to sit still. Care to join me? :)

Over Pastry and Chinese Tea

Picture - google search.

The week has been very hectic. Time was not on our side, and the ball never stopped rolling; it was nerve-wrecking.

As I sit here over cream puff and chinese tea, it feels nice to put life on hold for one moment. To spend time with beloved ones and just chill over laughter and smiles.

One more week before the big event. Let's pray all things go well, as God wills.

For I know the plans I have for you, plans that will not harm you but will prosper you and give you a future with hope. (Jer 29:11)

Ready to Leave

Ever had a phase in life to move on and leave the past behind as it is? Hmm.. I've never actually been in that phase, but coming soon is the preparation to leave.

Leaving to where? No idea. But I'm leaving my past.

It's a tough decision to make that made us chose this path. The balance of benefits for all parties, the fine line to draw for all. I don't figure myself being excited to leave, as that was how and where I became who I am now. I dislike going out, away from the "mother's wings" as people term it, but life has to move on.

And so, 3 months perhaps; I shall leave.

A new phase of life. A new outlook on living. A new me?

Embrace the change, endure the toughness, enlarge the view of life.

Move on~!

When time is not on our side

As time passes, I begin to acknowledge its presence and how it plays such importance in a person's life. Without time, who are we and what are we?

When we are so free, when time just ticks past without us realising, how beautiful it is to just be carefree and all about our own world.

When time hits us in the face and sticks the note "You're late!" be it for an event, for work or simply anything, we rush for time. When all the while: time has been there - ticking at the same pace!

Time has always been fair; it is us who have paid less attention to it, hence the struggle we face at the end of the day. The "I wish there's more time.." phrase will be ringing through the air.

So when time is not on our side, let's make the best of it while we still can. Before time runs out. For real.

Careless

The week was a really holiday break. Life practically stopped just for the fun of the festival and I forgot about everything else except living the best of the week.

And of course, the consequences that come with it.

Somehow too long a break can reduce the effeciency of the brain and I end up being very careless with almost everything which lead to dissatisfaction of mind.

With the currect change in the cycle of life (supposedly new year has begun), productivity is to be enhanced. Less of the bad, and more of the good.

The future, I can't predict. But all I know is that someone's holding me to face it. With that, I trust and live in faith.

Valentine's + CNY

Who would have thought - 14 Feb: such memorable day for lovers and Chinese folks. Not to forget the birthdate of many friends I know of born on that date.

I recall few years back while in high school of which Valentine's Day was the most anticipated day (aside school holiday breaks), and as it's not a co-ed school, even higher anticipation when certain people walked into classrooms and called out names to receive gifts.

I believe Valentine's Day is not just about lovers buying gifts for each other. Even friends can honour each other's friendship by simply acknowledging their presence. Simple meals to remember the first time friendship was made, the happy and sad memories spent together, and so forth. Not to forget, it can be a day to surprise parents with an extra taste of love in everything we do. :) Somewhat similar to Father's and Mother's Day. It's simply a day to love.

Chinese New Year: the year of the tiger. Roar. Not that it has any significance to me, it's just another year in the chinese calendar where prosperity is hoped to flow and blessings showed from on high. This year CNY will be rather quiet with less people around, relatives and friends all going off for holidays/studies. (I agree with leaving for holiday - since economically, it is heading downwards.) Sometimes a quiet new year to spend with close ones is much memorable. :)

So how's it going to be? As the date draws nearer, let us celebrate - with LOVE! :D

Happy Valentine's Day!

and

Happy Chinese New Year!!

What next

With the recent theft case to kick start 2010, aside from turning a year older, it was rather ridiculous to get me down on my seat the whole time.

The case brought me so down that life felt some fear and injustice. What came next was nerve-wrecking, madness.

The thought of being kind was pushed, the heavy weight of responsibility crowned upon. Who else would have felt that would be next. Changes.

Life was not good, but it was never that bad. Optimism.. call on it and it will return to serve you. Hard as it is, one moment to cherish - one season to cheer.

The sun never fails to rise each new day, so does God never fail to love the sinner no matter how he hates the sin.

Conscious

My eyes were opened as bricks fell one after another. It was a sign the end was coming, and I was not too late to realise it, yet. I wonder if those around me who saw the bricks had their mind gates opened.

Sometimes I thought I was sub-conscious of what's happening around me. At times I wished it wasn't even real, this world I'm living in.

When troubles come our way, we wished we were in a dream. When blessings come flying pass, we wished we had been fast enough to catch and keep them in reality.

To learn to let go, and to learn to love what's gone.

Looking Forward

After practically mourning for 7 days after the incident, life's heading a U-turn to get back to having things done again. It was tough, to look back at it and see what could have been done before it really happened. But no one could predict it happened there and then, so things happen for a reason. Just had to accept that.

Got replacements, tried a hang of it - not too bad, lots to learn. Confusing enough yet not as nerve-wrecking. Glad. Just realised I lost more things to those early 'Santas' than I thought.

A good start, to keep me up and about. Optimism, life's never better without it. And the past lurks back to haunt things down. The dislikes.

Everyone's doing great I suppose. What can I say, people change, time flies - but God never fails.

Lev 26:12 - I will be your God, and you will be my people.

Segulah Yahweh: God's own possession.

How perfect it feels to be loved. :)

16 Jan 2010

This marks the 200th post.

It also talks about the first ever break-in at my house.

My one-year old laptop was taken, alongside the bag with my Aussie parrot, mouse, cooler pad and one-week old NEW ear phones! Sigh.

My only gold pendant given by my beloved grandaunty was taken. Sigh sigh.

My drawer was forced open and my old currency were taken, together with some 1 ringgit coins.

My whole collection of ear rings was taken, goodness knows why. No gold. No silver. I'm left with one pair which was not in the box apparently.

My hard discs were supposed to be taken, but somehow the thieves removed the casing and reluctantly put it back on the table? I suppose they realised they've taken enough documents in the laptop itself rather than destroy my whole life worth of works and memories by taking away my hard discs.

The dvd player was taken.

My dad's laptop alongside his office documents and pendrives and all his stuff in the bag was shouldered away.

The door grill was badly shaped. The door was replaced. Total losses estimated about RM5k.

We'll never know how precious something is until it is gone.

Thank God grandma was out with us for lunch. It was a mid-day break in. I'll never forget today. Ever.

Get-away

Thought of a great holiday get-away before class starts, and this was what I had:

Traffic jam.

Yet, it wasn't that bad considering the experience of being at 41st floor and walking on the KLCC bridge. But the queue for it was....super long. Started waiting since 7.30 am for a 10-min walk at 9.30 am. Not bad though, the view. :)

A visit to the bird park was rather pleasant with love birds, peacocks, parrots that greet you with "Hello" and "Apa khabar" and interesting bird shows. :)

Not to forget, the climb up to Batu Caves with 250+ steps on a hot sunny day with monkeys jumping around and snakes and iguanas being carried as pets.

Besides shopping and lots of walking and food testing in the malls, awesome food are not to be missed! You know them better than I do. :D

Even the attacks of Churches did not dampen our spirit to make full use of the few days of break, except the misfortune of being sick most of the days - yet still striving to not just stay at home to rest. A good experience being challenged of endurance and perseverance.

A great start for a new semester. :)

Age + 1

The time of the year to let go of the past and start the new year with a new hit!

Thank you everyone for making it a great one.

Life's never been better.

Thanks for the wishes, the SMSs, the calls, the laughter, the smiles, the JOY, the SALT water, the screams, the cake, the friendship, the love, the THOUGHTFULNESS, the Christ in you.

I had a HAPPY birthday to kick off a new year. :)

God bless ya all..