Concern indeed..

I came across this incident where a friend of mine asked "What's going on?" since I was sharing about something with another friend. So out of respect and trust that this other friend was kind enough to listen to my sharing, I shared. Before long this friend started giving remarks of own experiences too.

Well, I was sharing about life and how it has been.. surely there are ups and downs and apparently lately with more downs..so this friend too commented of own downs and how this friend still survives..

All I asked was just a listening ear and an open heart, I need no comments as yet. I had not even finished my words. Oh well, I let that friend talked and in the end I became the ear. Haha.

Funny friends I meet lately. So being concern does not necessarily mean you need to comfort the person.. silence might just do the work.

When sun rises and stars blink

Looking out the window each morning and night, I see the same images - all except the colour; it's bright yellow during the day and dark black during the night. As each day passes by, the time left for each other also shortens.

A friend once shared with me, one should find time to spend with close friends now that they are still here with us, rather than wait till they have left (for all reasons) then think about going out with them.

It is selfish just to spend time developing a friendship just for the sake of boosting the friend's self-esteem, or building the foundation of faith, so a friend said. As a result, when the friend can stand on one's own, the initial friend lets go so the friend can move on. There silence filled the communication atmosphere, though little thoughts of kindness do travel through the air now and then to keep the string attached.

The thought of wanting the best for the friend has been reflected back: that just making friends for that reason and letting the friend go after the 'mission' has been accomplished are one-way acts, for one's own personal benefits not wanting to have further relation with the friend.

But whatever happened to mutual understanding and lasting friendship? Two friends are true friends if both can still maintain good relationship despite the many silent moments spent together. Is that even true?

I'm confused at how perception changes the whole human mind. I have yet to find out how to channel my sight to see the unique perception of others. Until then, I shall see the sun rise and stars blink each day and night.

Over Pastry and Chinese Tea

Picture - google search.

The week has been very hectic. Time was not on our side, and the ball never stopped rolling; it was nerve-wrecking.

As I sit here over cream puff and chinese tea, it feels nice to put life on hold for one moment. To spend time with beloved ones and just chill over laughter and smiles.

One more week before the big event. Let's pray all things go well, as God wills.

For I know the plans I have for you, plans that will not harm you but will prosper you and give you a future with hope. (Jer 29:11)

Age + 1

The time of the year to let go of the past and start the new year with a new hit!

Thank you everyone for making it a great one.

Life's never been better.

Thanks for the wishes, the SMSs, the calls, the laughter, the smiles, the JOY, the SALT water, the screams, the cake, the friendship, the love, the THOUGHTFULNESS, the Christ in you.

I had a HAPPY birthday to kick off a new year. :)

God bless ya all..

The Ending, and Beginning

2009 is ending soon... in 4 days. Come to think of it, this year moved quite fast. :) Perhaps because when you are busy, you don't realise time flies.

So, updates...



After weeks of practising hard and memorising scores, we ended up having...


The best carolling experience so far. :) Look at the smiles. Beaming shouts of joy!

Beautiful children singing beautiful songs with beautiful voices. Awesome.

That's Christmas. Celebration of a Son's birth, so great and mighty; trumpeted on rooftops and chimneys! Happy Birthday Jesus!

Which leads to...

New Year 2010! And another year of awesome happenings to look forward to!

Can't wait, can't wait!! XD

The Doorknob

Talk about being scared of something really funny. Redness.

Once upon a time, there was a door. This door was a wooden one, and had a hole in the place of the doorknob, supposingly. The eye played tricks and I saw no hole - but a great nice unique, out of the world kind of doorknob. Interesting! It looked something like this.

Nothing suspicious, as it was dark at night. Hence my hand swung pass it.. and it breathed into my hands! For the worse nightmare, I screamed la!

And my friend jumped out of his skin.

It was actually a Golden Retriever, or something like that. The big dog species. Only after I screamed did it bark and showed its teeth.

My heart died pumping oxygen to my brain. Thank God for handrails, else I would have dived into the longkang immediately. And thank God my friend did not pass out else I couldn't get home that night. Thank God nothing happened except for just increased heartbeats.

An unforgettable experience, for my friend yes. For me.. I'll forget about it soon enough. Haha!

So the next time you see a doorknob, look carefully. It might be a snake head instead.

rof nyleve wohc

Once upon a time there was a girl who was born on the eve of the next day. She was born with bright colours and enlightening eyes that it made her parents feel...so bonded and close to her that they leaned on her dearly!! So here comes... eVELYN@eve@lyn@missCHOW.

This girl has nice eyes but she's always deprived of sleep hence the closed eyes during the day...

"Sleepy lar.... faster liao..." (smiles)

She loves to talk... so she puts on this look whenever she's on the talkative mode.

I tell you ar, my hair's the latest one you know! It covers my pimples right here! *points*

As you have noticed those plates pushed aside, this friend also loves to eat! Man, she can appreciate food.... (And never get fat! Though she has a shirt that says "I'm fat! Really?" Well, you're not.)

"Ooooh...food...yummy.."

When you bring her for lunch with good food as such:

She will immediately say:

"I want!!!"

And being a fan of handbags and fashion, she loves to shop and put on nice things whenever she goes out.

"You, buy me that bag!"

"Look! I've got a new watch!" (Notice her bracelet and necklace too? *winks*)

Not forgetting, when she's down and out...

"Talk to the hand, people... I'm tired.." (but can still smile)

But knowing that in her journey of life this far she has met great friends, she found God through a fellowship of children similar to herself..and she can be herself just like the rest of them...

She cannot help but find freedom to live her life as God has planned for her after God said to her "I love you!"... so she appreciates her life more than before, even in the washroom. XD

And so, dear Evelyn, a very happy and blessed 21st BirthDAY!! Now that you're legal, BE GOOD ok! Here's your birthday cake!

Looks familiar?
I'll poke in the candles soon. 2 big, 1 small.

Oh ya, one more! Did you count the smiles?? Haha! :D

ps: Photos courtesy of cath and pls no stealing of photos without permission. This post is dedicated to a good friend and sister-in-Christ.

The Week

Ah I'm back... :)

After a whole long week of ....rush and all sorts of feelings and experiences, time to get back to reality and sit here and type again. So what's with the week?

Sunday - Tuesday: Mid-Term review of the Pastoral Focus on the Family by Archdiocese of Kuching. Had the priviledge of sharing my life story to 300 delegates from 11 parishes including the Shepherd and all other priests.. wow. :)

But with the car cooking my patience on the second day and causing lots of inconveniences and panic and worries, ah.... I almost died of I-don't-know-what-to-do... yet things just unfolded fine on its own at its own time.

Wed - "Break time" before the 'second half' of the week. Supposingly to get rest and take a break off the 3-day conference and prepare for the Leadership Formation camp (LFC) but... as usual, last minute-ness and craziness ate me up. Battery almost ran flat.

Thurs morning - supposingly get all shopping done for camp the day before but something else crept up and somehow things had to be done alone and unknown. So shopping carried forward and was "supposed" to go up Mt Singai in the morning but the car meragam again and caused more casualties. I got to rest no doubt, (well I needed it in the first place) but then things at camp happened and there were miscommunication and...no one's cooking for us? Thank God for an angel who just 'happened' to be at camp who's taking cooking lessons so he cooked for us with a team of half-pail knowledge assistants. :D

Camp dragged for 48 hours and we got back Kuching on Sat evening, of which we (as if not tired enough) went for makan and minum at Open Air and then back to office to chit chat and then later at night went to McD for a farewell drink with the "camp chef" before he leaves for studies.

Sunday - How time flies. It's a week gone. Supposed to get the assignment done, yet nothing's ready. Quiz on Monday yet I was flat at home, recharging. Mum insisted to go back to her dad's place so had to tag along and spent half morning, lunch and half afternoon there... Pond harvesting. :) Swimming in the mud for the guys = cool~ Got back home and dozed off for 15 minutes before going out again. I almost died. My legs ached madly, going up and down the mountain twice. I salute those guys going up and down 4-5 times, each time carrying stuff up, eg. diesel 5 gallon x 3 sets x 6 persons. Thank you guys. :) I'm sure you will be rewarded with muscles soon.

Sunday night - dinner. And there we laughed like crazy people who've never laughed before. Now with 4 crazy animators, we have a new generation of crazy student leaders. :S

Monday - morning I couldn't get my brain to work. Dad drove me home to sleep after mass and breakfast and I only touched on supply and demand 3 hours before the quiz. Brain froze at the start of it, but got it done in the end. Hope all's fine.

And so... the week's over. I've got office work piling up, camp work to be finished and some minors here and there to get settled. Life's just the beginning of something new. When one thing's done, something new and better creeps up. Till then, goodnight!

Away

While you are reading this, I am away for a South East Asia gathering somewhere outside Malaysia. It's a hectic August for me, with my schedule fully packed and more to come, finding empty slots in my planner.

Being away from home without guardians outside Malaysia is a first-time for me. I am no traveller, and my survival skills can be rated top from below. But yea, leaving it all in God's hands. :)

So.. how are you doing back home? :)

I'll try to find time to share my experience during my absence, and hopefully you will learn something too!

Sharing is caring, indirectly gaining.

Upcoming

The document's out. Preparations must be done. Thought it was not right to do it that way, so we did it another way yet now it was consented to do the former. ...what a waste.

Anyway, upcoming events!

Ever wondered why sometimes we get soooo excited about a certain event coming up very very soon, and when the event date comes nearer by just a week, you tend to lose those anxiety and excitement? I suppose that happens when you have too much to look forward to, till you forget which one to be more excited about. And it's happening.

It seems rather a tasteless feeling that things and people fail you one after another. As people would always say, give them another chance. Yea. Another chance. And another, and another, and another... so that you'll be given chances too, when it hits back on you one day. Ah... the counter-attack.

All the same, :) I suppose smiling is still top on my list. It gets very annoying that you know the other side of being on one side of yourself. Doubt if you get what I mean, but it's so hard to think of the fuller half cup at times. Sometimes I wish to just pour everything away and start refilling once more. It frusts when you try to go against your own human self, knowing better of the spiritual self. Ahh..

With all these upcoming events, I've been thinking whether I'm up for it. Whether I'm really into it now, as I awaited its arrival weeks and months ago. I don't know why all these were planned, but somehow I contradict myself lately. Perhaps leaving it up to God would be the best decision, yet at the same time to do some personal thinking as well. :S

GiveMeOnePureAndHolyPassion - song of my day. thoughts of my heart. cries of my soul.

Coincidence?

Today was first day of exam. I suppose things were ok except the fact that there were some annoying signs from the working parts.

All the same, on the way home today I stopped by the cake house to grab a long piece of raisin bread for grandma. At the same time, while leaving the place, was it just coincidence or God's plan; that I met a long-time-no-see good friend of mine who hardly came home for holidays and we hardly met ever since we last did. It's been a year, and my has she changed~!

Apparently, all I did was scream her name in the car and dad stopped in the middle of the road and wound down the window and I just screamed her name, and she screamed mine. It was in the hot sun, in the middle of the road, alongside busy coffee shops and next to the hectic roadside traffic. Imagine the people watching us.

We hugged and hugged, and just couldn't stop laughing at such 'coincidence'. And we made future plans.

So, my point for the day; was it just coincidence? Or was it planned?

For myself personally, many things happening in our life are planned. Think about it. Ever wondered why at times when we needed something we lacked, and the next moment, someone else comes with it? Or when we're rushing to a certain place and the traffic happens to be green all the way? Perhaps you would say, "Mine's red all the way!" Well, would you think in a way that if you rushed through the red lights, would it cause your life, or worse the lives of others?

Whether it is a belief or not, things do happen for a reason. Nothing is coincident unless you refuse to believe it is planned. So is it coincidence for you to read this post of mine? Or is it coincidence that we just happen to know each other as friends?

Venturing Out

Ever felt at times you wish to try something new, something ..out of the ordinary? But contradicting that feeling is the thought of face, or the what would people think about me mindset which usually stops us from going out and trying new things.

Actually... one should just put them all aside for once, and feel the ultimate freedom. :) It's rather nice, once in a while.

Break free.

Today I gave in to curling my hair. *gasps* It sounded so-really-not-me but the fun of running away without the goody-two shoes for once, is unforgettable. *big smile* Despite that, it seems fine now as I type this. My hair's back to normal. :D

So. Your turn. :) Put a foot outside your circle and experience the difference altogether in that short period of time. It might be as simple as curling your straight hair or as complex as making a life decision... :) easy or hard, dare yourself for the challenges that come your way through those steps you take, and embrace the fun time you'll bound to have!

Xiao Di Di

Today is my xiao di di's birthday. He's now 18, legal. O.o

I met this person in January. When I entered first day of class, he was there already. At first I thought he was a friend of some other friends of mine, or went into the wrong class, or something.. but he was actually a new student in my class. XP Hence the handshakes and introduction was made.

Throughout these 6 months studying together, I realized that there IS such thing as unending sarcasm and that one can be so pessimist towards life yet live to see it crumble? But there is also the good side of him that he reveals only to the known and when needed. Hmm. All the same, this person finally came into my class as the person whom I can speak English to, for the rest are mostly Mandarin speakers. :P

Despite all the "pain" this person gave me, and is still giving me, it is indeed an honor to be his classmate. To have someone who scores 19/20 for Bio test and still owes us KFC, and still owes me a lot of stories on 'retrenchment' and 'stories-I'll-never-understand', God has really been gracious to let me meet and know you! :)

Oh, and since you are 18, practise wisdom ya. :) Hope my leaves have helped you in one way or another. Thank you for being my friend and brother; for being there when in times of need. May you have a blessed birthday and many great returns for a great future filled with hope~!

Shoulder Support

There will be times when we encounter experiences of being alone, confused, rejected.. and terribly in need of someone.

There are other times when the worse got better of us and we feel the world falling down on us as we split ourselves unknowingly, piece by piece.

For those times, have we ever wondered; what actually was happening to us? Why were we acting that way?

That's normal human reaction to a stimulus - or an event that impacts us emotionally or mentally - something that we can never understand why, for in the beginning we were created this way. And it is good, as a matter of fact. To be able to realise the need to release; to realise the feeling of oneself in a certain situation.

But in the midst of all these 'down' moments, there is a shoulder support somewhere next to us. Whether we realise it or not, it is there. And it is always ready, waiting for us to give the SOS signal - despite the uncertain thoughts we have of that support.

So at times of desperation, do not hesitate to look for a shoulder for support. :) They are there, just put pride aside and call out for once.

Recalling

Now is the season of reunion. Near and far, friends come back to visit those who are stuck in hometown. And would you look at them!

It's been only about 2 years that separation occurred. Recalling what happened approximately during 5 years ago, indeed time and place change things around. Not to say it is bad, but it's all part of growing up and building of personality. :) Somehow, glad to see the good changes.

Still, good old memories should remain. We should never forget our base. :)

Of Mineral Water and Coordinator

This morning was at college. For a reason to get mineral water bottle supplies from Coordinator. Apparently Miss Early was there already, alone. Went up to hunt for Coordinator but she went somewhere so decided to wait with Miss Early. :P

Then after the mineral water boxes were transfered, we had a friendly talk. It seemed that neither her nor us was happy with the separation. Spending 3-months together felt so short a time to know each other better, now that we won't have such great opportunity anymore. But one thing to be happy about is that she has finally chosen the right path in which she will enjoy and treasure most. Sad though it seems, but it's a door to a new walk of life. And for that we must rejoice.

Almost got her into tears, which would be a true witness to the bond we've built. Here's wishing you the very best, and with many thanks for a great experience.

Falling Meteors

I don't know what to say. Neither do I know what to do.

When everything seems to go well, and then suddenly this temperature rises and poof meteors start falling. Not on everyone, but on that particular someone only.

I feel it's rather unfair that someone had to bear the consequences when everything in the first place was not of that someone's fault. Hard to say, I suppose unexpected incidents happen due to lack of alertness.

But I still think the meteors shouldn't be falling down so direct and killing till that someone is now injured and refusing to seek hospital treatment. Not only one meteor; but TWO? THREE? Give that someone a break, you people called friends.

TOEFL

Today was the big day for the big English test as foreign language (TOEFL). 5 of us went together; we practically started studying together, journeyed together and sat for the test together. I saw it all.

That morning while at registration, problem came. We all had no passports as identification document. =.= There panic came over Anne, whereas the rest of us, surprisingly remained calm as if there were no big issue. Anne got us the certification letter from college which guaranteed our papers being marked - phew - else we would have been in deep deep trouble.

My personal experience during exam: I almost fell asleep during the test. =.= Of all times, and all exams, this. Well, practically because the day before was a little too hectic for me too and I suffered the consequences after test. Had to stay in bed the whole afternoon for good, for once. And for the last time hopefully.

But overall, we all survived it. Results will be out in about 6 weeks time. By then, what's done is done. After all, what matters is we did our best and let the result be the judge.

To the rest of you taking the test with me, well done! :)

To those who prayed and supported silently or loudly from behind, thank you for your helping hand. :)

To the test markers, please be in good mood when marking our essays. :)

Till then, 6 weeks.

Deep

It has never occured to me that something like these would happen all at the same time. Sharing it out never seemed to help, except more critics coming in that prioritizing was not in place. And it went really deep..

It was fine at first. Some people are just known for their interesting method of commenting and comforting speech. Some on the other hand, do not bother to think of the otherwise. Some times, little things said or done, can mean a lot to some other people; whether or not sensitivity is in thought.

Judging priority is not the easiest thing to do. Not if it involves the most important things in life. At times, won't it be great if in such dilemma, a person can just be the silent companion yet caring and nursing the quiet moments.. and not dig deeper.

I personally, think it has gone deep enough. :)

Do get some rest while I fill it up with soil again. =)

Ignored

It feels really sad, to know that the person you are working with, keeps things from you.

It feels really sad, that the person you think you are journeying with, has someone else to journey more with, and neglects you.

It feels really sad, to know the fact that things are kept from you is because for your own good, yet they forgot to think of your feelings of being kept off things.

It feels really sad, when that person - is you.

And not only you, there's more of you.

All of you.